How We Met

Fun video - very creative!

Happy Thanksgiving and The Turkey Day Blue

I talked to my coach yesterday, and she asked me what my plans are for Thanksgiving. I said, "Well, my parents and in-laws are overseas, and my sister and cousins all seem to be too busy this year to get together. So, we (the four of us) are basically on our own this year."

Her response was, "Oh, I am SO envious of you! I'm going to my mom's for Thanksgiving tomorrow, and I'm SO not looking forward to it!"

Sounds like my coach has a serious case of Turkey Day Blue.

I guess we are lucky. My husband and I are so laid back this year. In fact, he suggested going to an all-you-can-eat Japanese seafood buffet for Thanksgiving dinner. We figured, none of us are huge fans of turkey. Honestly, I'm not interested in laboring for hours to cook something I'm not so crazy about, and the kids probably wouldn't miss it. Well, we were wrong. My son protested, when I mentioned that there won't be a turkey dinner this Thanksgiving. So, this was 9:30pm Monday night, 2 days before Thanksgiving, and DH and I were going online & calling up nearby grocery stores, trying to order a Thanksgiving dinner for four.

Of course, most of the places had either sold out their Thanksgiving dinners, or they required a big order like a party of 10 or more.

It's kind of funny, when you think about it. All I wanted was a very small turkey (so we won't be stuck, or I should say, stuffed, with turkey leftovers for weeks!) but my son wanted the mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and the whole 9 yards. Well, he is always the one in our family with the most "American stomach".

Did we find our turkey dinner? Yes, we finally found it on Tuesday, so yes, we will be having a traditional turkey dinner tonight, instead of Japanese sushi & seafood.

I'm very grateful for whatever dinner we have, and most of all, for my very beautiful, happy & healthy family who will be sitting at the dinner table together.

As for my poor coach (and anyone reading this) who's got the Turkey Day Blue, I send my sympathy and blessings.

I asked my coach this question, and if you also have the Turkey Day Blue, this would be a good question for you to ponder.

This is what I said to her: "Here is a coaching question for you: If your goal is to have more peace & joy and less stress, what would you commit to do differently this holiday season?"

P.S. If you can't answer that question, maybe you can benefit from my upcoming Teleclass "Joyful and Stress-less Holidays". Sign up here.

I wish you and your family
a very happy
(and hopefully relaxing)
Thanksgiving holiday!

THE Shortcut to Joy

© copyright 2007 Hueina Su, Beyond Horizon Coaching

The other day, I was presenting a workshop called "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life". One of the principles I shared was "Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." This principle always seems to strike a chord in the audience, and they often ask "How can you not suffer when bad things happen?"


Happiness is a Choice

Do you believe that life is supposed to be joyful and happiness is a choice?

Some people believe that life is all about pain and suffering. Some even act like the more they suffer, and/or self-sacrifice (think martyr), they will be able to collect some kind of reward at the end of life. Since our thoughts & beliefs create our reality, if you buy into that kind of beliefs, I think the only reward you will get is a self-fulfilling prophecy of a life full of suffering.

Sure, it's much easier to be happy when your life is all wine and roses. However, as you must have experienced, most of the times, things don't necessarily go our way. Sometimes, bad things do happen to good people, including you and me. That's when your free will and choice come into play.

Do you choose to see the glass as half-full or half-empty?

Do you choose to play victim and drown in self-pity, or do you choose to take 100% responsibility and take charge to find solutions?

Can you choose to see the positive side in everything, and be at peace no matter what?

Sometimes we have no control over the circumstances or events that happen in our life. If we were to change how we feel, the only thing we could change is how we interpret and respond to the events. There is always more than one way of looking at things. It really depends on from which angle you look at it.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. We may or may not see it, or appreciate it, but whatever happens in our lives is meant to help us grow into who we are meant to be, or help us move forward on our journey. When you choose to take on this belief, it would be easier to accept and be at peace with whatever you perceive as negative circumstances that you cannot change.


Uncommon Blessings

Sometimes when you are going through a particularly challenging time of your life, it might not be so easy to find the blessings. Can you recall something from your past that you thought was THE worst thing that could happen to you, and yet years later you realized that was actually a blessing in disguise? We all have this type of experience. What does it tell you? If you believe in a Higher Power and a Master Plan, it would be a little easier for you to trust that everything will work out eventually for your best interest. So, instead of suffering through it, why not choose to believe that it's a blessing in disguise, and choose to find the positive and/or the lesson presented to you.

Years ago I came to US for graduate school. I was very excited about the opportunity to live in a new country and pursue a graduate degree. However, within the first month, I had to have an emergency surgery, and ended up having to withdraw from all classes for the entire semester. I was devastated. The doctor came to congratulate me when he was about to discharge me and noticed that I seemed depressed. He couldn't understand why, since the surgery was very successful and it probably saved my life. I told him that I was very disappointed that I had to withdraw from all classes and waste the whole semester. It seemed like such a huge disaster back then. However, years later when I look back, all I feel is gratitude. I'm so grateful for those friends who took me to the ER in the middle of the night, and everyone who took care of me after the surgery. I'm grateful for the skillful doctor who cured a painful condition that had plagued me for years. I'm also grateful for those 3 months I got to spend in recovery. It took me a long time to realize that, that was the only 3 months in my adult life that I did not have a job, or school, or family. Hey, I didn't even have a boyfriend. I didn't have to take care of anything, or anyone. The only task I had in those 3 months was to focus on healing myself, and doing whatever I enjoyed doing. Coming out of a demanding nursing job and a challenging relationship, that was just the break I needed, before jumping into a new chapter in my life. It was, indeed, a blessing in disguise.


THE Shortcut to Joy

If all else fails, and you can't get out of a foul mood, I highly recommend that you take THE shortcut to joy -- count your blessings. I'm sure it's not difficult to find plenty of people and things that you are grateful for in your life. Bring them into your mind's eyes, and say thank-you silently to each one of them. Better yet, call or write to some of the people you are grateful for, and let them know how much you appreciate them. Trust me, you will feel better almost instantly.

So, here's my "Rx for Joy" for you: Count your blessings. Stat. Repeat as necessary.

"Reflect upon your blessings, of which every man has plenty, not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some."
-- Charles Dickens

"The Balancing Act": my radio interview

I was interviewed on the radio show "Protect Your American Dream" on November 13, 2007. The topic was "The Balancing Act". This radio show is mostly about financial issues, however, Jaynee Sasso, the host, invited me because she has seen the negative impact of poor time management in work-life balance, as well as in financial success.

As a professional life & business coach, I help my clients prioritize and re-design their lives, to create more work-life balance, reduce stress, improve self-care, achieve personal & career goals, and live the life they truly desire. These days, work-life balance seems to have become an impossible dream for most people. We all wear multiple hats, which comes with multitudes of responsibilities and obligations. Combining that with the need to please (or the inability to say NO) and poor time management skills, and you easily get side-tracked from your priorities and long-term goals, not to mention the possibility of burnout, depression, or even dis-ease.

So, what can you do to effectively manage your time so that you can achieve your goals, take care of your priorities, nurture yourself and avoid burnout? How do you prioritize your tasks? How do you avoid "busy-ness" and improve productivity? How do you say NO so that you can free up time for yourself and what's important for you? In this radio interview I offered many practical tips and strategies that you can apply to your life.

Click here to listen to the interview recording. Visit my website for more information about my coaching programs and FREE Teleclass series. While you are there, don't forget to sign up to download your FREE Intensive Self-Care Kit.