THE Shortcut to Joy

© copyright 2007 Hueina Su, Beyond Horizon Coaching

The other day, I was presenting a workshop called "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life". One of the principles I shared was "Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." This principle always seems to strike a chord in the audience, and they often ask "How can you not suffer when bad things happen?"


Happiness is a Choice

Do you believe that life is supposed to be joyful and happiness is a choice?

Some people believe that life is all about pain and suffering. Some even act like the more they suffer, and/or self-sacrifice (think martyr), they will be able to collect some kind of reward at the end of life. Since our thoughts & beliefs create our reality, if you buy into that kind of beliefs, I think the only reward you will get is a self-fulfilling prophecy of a life full of suffering.

Sure, it's much easier to be happy when your life is all wine and roses. However, as you must have experienced, most of the times, things don't necessarily go our way. Sometimes, bad things do happen to good people, including you and me. That's when your free will and choice come into play.

Do you choose to see the glass as half-full or half-empty?

Do you choose to play victim and drown in self-pity, or do you choose to take 100% responsibility and take charge to find solutions?

Can you choose to see the positive side in everything, and be at peace no matter what?

Sometimes we have no control over the circumstances or events that happen in our life. If we were to change how we feel, the only thing we could change is how we interpret and respond to the events. There is always more than one way of looking at things. It really depends on from which angle you look at it.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. We may or may not see it, or appreciate it, but whatever happens in our lives is meant to help us grow into who we are meant to be, or help us move forward on our journey. When you choose to take on this belief, it would be easier to accept and be at peace with whatever you perceive as negative circumstances that you cannot change.


Uncommon Blessings

Sometimes when you are going through a particularly challenging time of your life, it might not be so easy to find the blessings. Can you recall something from your past that you thought was THE worst thing that could happen to you, and yet years later you realized that was actually a blessing in disguise? We all have this type of experience. What does it tell you? If you believe in a Higher Power and a Master Plan, it would be a little easier for you to trust that everything will work out eventually for your best interest. So, instead of suffering through it, why not choose to believe that it's a blessing in disguise, and choose to find the positive and/or the lesson presented to you.

Years ago I came to US for graduate school. I was very excited about the opportunity to live in a new country and pursue a graduate degree. However, within the first month, I had to have an emergency surgery, and ended up having to withdraw from all classes for the entire semester. I was devastated. The doctor came to congratulate me when he was about to discharge me and noticed that I seemed depressed. He couldn't understand why, since the surgery was very successful and it probably saved my life. I told him that I was very disappointed that I had to withdraw from all classes and waste the whole semester. It seemed like such a huge disaster back then. However, years later when I look back, all I feel is gratitude. I'm so grateful for those friends who took me to the ER in the middle of the night, and everyone who took care of me after the surgery. I'm grateful for the skillful doctor who cured a painful condition that had plagued me for years. I'm also grateful for those 3 months I got to spend in recovery. It took me a long time to realize that, that was the only 3 months in my adult life that I did not have a job, or school, or family. Hey, I didn't even have a boyfriend. I didn't have to take care of anything, or anyone. The only task I had in those 3 months was to focus on healing myself, and doing whatever I enjoyed doing. Coming out of a demanding nursing job and a challenging relationship, that was just the break I needed, before jumping into a new chapter in my life. It was, indeed, a blessing in disguise.


THE Shortcut to Joy

If all else fails, and you can't get out of a foul mood, I highly recommend that you take THE shortcut to joy -- count your blessings. I'm sure it's not difficult to find plenty of people and things that you are grateful for in your life. Bring them into your mind's eyes, and say thank-you silently to each one of them. Better yet, call or write to some of the people you are grateful for, and let them know how much you appreciate them. Trust me, you will feel better almost instantly.

So, here's my "Rx for Joy" for you: Count your blessings. Stat. Repeat as necessary.

"Reflect upon your blessings, of which every man has plenty, not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some."
-- Charles Dickens

Life Lessons: The Girl with 4 Boyfriends

A good friend of mine sent this story to me. It provides a fresh perspective on what truly matters.
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Once upon a time there was this girl who had four boyfriends.

She loved the 4th boyfriend the most and adored him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.

She also loved the 3rd boyfriend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.

She also loved her 2nd boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her.

Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times.

The girls 1st boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him.

One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, 'I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone'.

Thus, she asked the 4th boyfriend, 'I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'No way!', replied the 4th boyfriend, and he walked away without another word.

His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked the 3rd boyfriend,'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'No!', replied the 3rd boyfriend. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!'

Her heart sank and turned cold.

She then asked the 2nd boyfriend, 'I have always turned to you for help and
you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'I'm sorry , I can't help you out this time!', replied the 2nd boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.'

His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.

Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go.'

The girl looked up, and there was her first boyfriend. He was very skinny as
he suffered from malnutrition and neglect.

Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when
I had the chance!'

In truth, you have 4 boyfriends in your lives:

Your 4th boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your 3rd boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth. When you die, it will all go to others.

Your 2nd boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

And your 1st boyfriend is your Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world.

However, your Soul is the only thing that will follow you where ever you go.

Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of Heaven and continue with you throughout Eternity.

"Being happy doesn't mean every thing's perfect.
It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections."

Journey into Love

Happy Mother's Day!!!

As I woke up to this beautiful sunny day this morning, having just returned from a whole day of empowering experience at the Morristown Women's Festival yesterday, I felt totally at peace and joyful. I felt loved. And, above all, I felt grateful.

It's been an absolutely amazing journey for me as a mother. My daughter is 11 and my son is 9 this year. I feel blessed to have my Mom and sisters (pictured, I was 3 months pregnant with my daughter in that picture), and so many wonderful girlfriends with me on this journey.

Just as we are growing our children, our children are growing us! I've learned so much about myself, and grown so much as a woman.

I hope you celebrate today, knowing that you are the perfect mom for your child(ren).

I hope you enjoy this day, knowing that no matter where you are on your life's journey, you are on the right path to become the woman you are meant to be.

I hope you trust and surrender to your Self, and relax into it.

I hope you let your Inner Goddess come out and play, even just for a day!

I hope you savor today, knowing that you are loved.

You hold within you the love you are seeking.

You are LOVE.

Written by Hueina Su on Mother's Day, May 13, 2007

An Poem That Gives You Goosebumps

I received this awesome poem from a friend, and I'd like to share with you. I got goosebumps reading it..... Get your Kleenex ready before you read this.


A drunk man in an Oldsmobile
They said had run the light
That caused the six-car pileup
On 109 that night.

When broken bodies lay about
And blood was everywhere,
The sirens screamed out eulogies,
For death was in the air.

A mother, trapped inside her car,
Was heard above the noise;
Her plaintive plea near split the air:
"Oh, God, please spare my boys!"
She fought to loose her pinned hands;
She struggled to get free,
But mangled metal held her fast
In grim captivity.
Her frightened eyes then focused
On where the back seat once had been,
But all she saw was broken glass and
Two children's seats crushed in.
Her twins were nowhere to be seen;
She did not hear them cry,
And then she prayed they'd been thrown free,
"Oh, God, don't let them die! "

Then firemen came and cut her loose,
But when they searched the back,
They found therein no little boys,
But the seat belts were intact.
They thought the woman had gone mad
And was traveling alone.
But when they turned to question her,
They discovered she was gone.

Policemen saw her running wild
And screaming above the noise
"In beseeching supplication, Please help me find my boys!
They're four years old and wear blue shirts;
Their jeans are blue to match."

One cop spoke up, "They're in my car,
And they don't have a scratch.
They said their daddy put them there,
And gave them each a cone,
Then told them both to wait for Mom
To come and take them home.
I've searched the area high and low,
But I can't find their dad.
He must have fled the scene,
I guess, and that is very bad."

The mother hugged the twins and said,
While wiping at a tear,
"He could not flee the scene, you see,
For he's been dead a year."

The cop just looked confused and asked,
"Now, how can that be true? "

The boys said, "Mommy, Daddy came
And left a kiss for you.
He told us not to worry
And that you would be all right,
And then he put us in this car with
The pretty, flashing light.
We wanted him to stay with us,
Because we miss him so,
But Mommy, he just hugged us tight
And said he had to go.
He said someday we'd understand
And told us not to fuss,
And he said to tell you, Mommy,
He's watching over us."

The mother knew without a doubt
That what they spoke was true,
For she recalled their dad's last words,
"I will watch over you."

The fireman's notes could not explain
The twisted, mangled car,
And how the three of them escaped
Without a single scar.
But on the cop's report was scribed,
In print so very fine,
An angel walked the beat tonight on Highway 109.

James Ray Teleclass on April 5th

FYI: This sounds like a great Teleclass. I've just signed myself up.

James Ray, as you know, is one of the teachers from The Secret.

This Teleclass is tomorrow night, April 5th, so make sure you check it out today!

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Carnival of Healing is Today's Featured Carnival at BlogCarnival.com

I just found out that Carnival of Healing is Today's Featured Carnival at the Blog Carnival today!

More excitingly, they are featuring THE edition (Carnival of Healing #78: Blossom into More) I hosted on March 24 on my other blog.

Carnival of Healing is a weekly collection of articles about health & healing, personal development and spirituality. There are some really good articles in the edition I hosted. Check them out!




When you click on the Carnival of Healing link it takes you right to my post. This is soooo cool. Considering that there are 9190 editions of 1375 Carnivals listed on the Blog Carnival website and 167 new Carnivals in the past 30 days alone, it's a very rare opportunity to be the Featured Carnival.

Go check it out TODAY!!! They feature one carnival every day, so if you miss it today, you won't see it!!!

Oprah Meets Jerry, Esther and Abraham!

Oprah will be talking to Abraham and Jerry & Esther Hicks on XM Radio. Tune in to "Talk to Me" on XM Satellite Radio's "Oprah & Friends" channel (XM 156) on March 29th, April 5th and April 9th. Visit Abraham-Hicks website for detailed show schedules. Or visit www.oprah.com/xm or www.xmradio.com/oprah.

If you don't have an XM Radio subscription, you can sign up for a free on-line trial at this link.

Carnival of Healing #78: Blossom into More

This week I am hosting Carnival of Healing #78: Blossom into More on my other blog Intensive Care for the Nurturer's Soul.

Carnival of Healing is a weekly round-up of personal Web sites and blogs on the topics of holistic health, wellness, spirituality, and self empowerment. In honor of the first day of Spring (March 21) and my upcoming birthday, I decided to choose a spring-like title for this edition of the Carnival of Healing.

Spring, to me, signifies renewal, growth and hope. There is also a tremendous sense of empowerment to observe how the entire planet and its creatures "come back to life", so to speak, after a brutal winter. Even the tiniest of seed holds the power and potential within to sprout and grow into something spectacular. As human beings, we have more options and choices than plants and most animals in the nature. We ought to celebrate and harness the power within us, to heal ourselves and make this world a better place. I'd like to share with you a quote I came across the other day.

"You are built not to shrink down to less
but to blossom into more."
-- Oprah Winfrey

I hope you allow your self and your life to grow into full bloom.

Go over to my other blog now to read all the fantastic articles we have this week!

Carnival of Healing #60: Echoes in Eternity

This week I am hosting the Carnival of Healing #60: Echoes in Eternity on Intensive Care for the Nurturer's Soul, and it's up today!

Carnival of Healing is a weekly round-up of personal Web sites and blogs on the topics of holistic health, wellness, spirituality, and self empowerment. This week there are 14 great articles to help you heal your body and nurture your soul. So go over there now and check out the Carnival of Healing #60: Echoes in Eternity.