Funny Poem about Motherhood

Found this funny poem about motherhood. Enjoy!

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Ode to Motherhood

Where did they go -
My beautiful hips,
look at what's left in their place....
Two handles of love
is what they say,
with stretch marks all over the place....

Where are they now
my perky firm breasts,
Oh there they are down there.....
Pointing towards my ankles
and knees,
hoisted up by the bras that I wear....

What happened to
my lovely smooth thighs,
They're covered in cellulite bulge...
they're thick and they're round
and it can't be from
all of the chocolate that I indulge...

I've said goodbye
to my firm and tight butt,
which is now as flat as a board....
It droops down to there
it hasn't a care
Yet it once seemed to be so adored....

There's no more nails
to paint blood red,
to be adorned with many gold rings....
They're cracked and chipped
and broken now
I no longer have time for such things....

But wait, what is that?
It's my fifth son's first smile,
and look it's because he loves me...
To him I'm the best
and most incredible thing
That his little eyes ever did see....

There'll be time later on
once he's all big and grown,
and he's got his own life to live...
For me to be sexy
and get it all back
But for now there's so much to give..

© Paula Pawson 2006