Thursday, October 19, 2006

Going with the Flow

Holly at Holly's Corner wrote about navigating her life as a river that keeps flowing & changing directions. It keeps you on your toes with all the curves and bends.

The thing is, the river of life is always flowing. Sometimes it's simply impossible to go upstream. You only get to live this life once. There is no use crying over the spilled milk. All we can do is to focus on the present moment, and look forward.

Things change. People change. Even our own values, priorities, preferences change over time too. Sometimes you have to give up the "steering wheel" and just go with the flow.

Holly was saying how 15 years ago she wanted so much to have 5 or more kids, but after years of trying, she ended up adopting two children. When all the other soccer moms were saying how they would like to have more children, she found herself past that stage of her life. She actually appreciates the freedom of going out to eat or do things she likes. "Most especially", She said, "I’m basking in the glory of not having to carry a diaper bag around."

It brought a smile to my face when I read that. Just yesterday, a few moms at our bus stop had the same conversation. One of the moms has 3 girls: 11, 8 and 3. While we were waiting for the afternoon bus, she was busy chasing after her 3-year-old & couldn’t really keep a conversation with the rest of us. Another mom finally commented: “I don’t really miss THAT.” And the rest of us all said “Me either”.

Oh I remember those Wonder Years. How I enjoyed nursing & cuddling my babies, and doing everything for them! But, I also remember how sometimes I went all day without a meal or a shower, and staying up all night caring for a sick child & cleaning up vomits on the carpet. I remember when my ONLY identity was "LK's mom" or "CB's mom". I remember how I rarely got to do anything just for me.

My daughter just turned 11 & my son 8. As much as I love how cute they were when they were little, and as much as I treasure all that time we spent together, I wouldn’t trade my hard-earned freedom for the diaper bag again (no matter how fashionable they are made now). LOL!

Yup, my river of life is flowing, and I am going with the flow....

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